Oct 12 2006
What’s it like to be married?
A married friend told me that getting married was so much better than dating because you didn’t always have to worry that he was going to leave you all the time, but I haven’t ever worried about that in the entire course of our relationship so there is no difference there.
Another friend told me that once you are married, it’s better because you work as a team but Steve and I have worked as a team for the last 2 or 3 years now (Team-o Supreme-o) especially when it came to being a united front to outside forces. It stopped being "you and I" and long time ago and became "we."
Oddly enough, after all the fuss and chaos of the wedding, being married is not actually any different from how life was before. I know we are only 2 weeks into it, but I half expected some big change in our relationship based on what friends had told me. After all the work and ceremony we are still Hillary and Steve and we still make Sloppy Joes with ground turkey, call each other ludicrous pet names, act like 5 year olds, add "o" to the end of every word and do happy dances randomly for our own amusement.
Now I know there are going to be other things that are going to throw off our routine such as kids, menopause, financial and physical issues that come with aging and other unforseen situations that come up, but I like that fact that, right now, being married is just like being how we always were, but now it’s just all official-like.
You know why I think most marriages fail? I am going to use the Sims to illustrate my point. In the Sims, when you want two Sims to get married, at first, it’s a lot of work. You flirt, admire, backrub, chat, peck, dirty joke, smooch, serenade, make-out etc until finally you get them to be engaged. Then you keep them appeased with more romantic kisses, sweet talks and wahoo’s in the hot tub while you buy a wedding arch, some chairs and a buffet table. Then you invite over all their friends and try to keep everyone in a good enough mood that you get a good party rating and then you let them get married.
But then, once they are married and the party is over, the groom is on the toilet taking a crap while the bride eats a moldy lunch meat sandwich while standing up and real life begins. When I play, unless I want them to have a baby, I pretty much never have the couple interact againĀ unless they are desperate for social contact and instead concentrate on furthering their careers and social lives.
I think this is how most people try to make real life marriages work. Once they’ve snagged the husband/wife they no longer make little romantic gestures or work at the relationship, because they figure the hard part is over.
Sure, there is always going to be that time when one of you is passed out in the road with the carpool beeping at you and when the other is cradling a flour sack and refusing to study mechanical, but as long as you can weather those times, and still work on your relationship together. I like the fact that Steve and I’s relationship hasn’t changed a bit. I like it because, if we can keep it this way, it means that we will stay at the same even keel no matter what life sends us.
Except for the zombies. I don’t know how we’ll handle those.
You may also enjoy these related posts. . .









