“Move a log. Go nuts.”

Log. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

At the beginning of Act 2, Scene 3 of The Love of Three Oranges, the stage directions read:

Strike the cauldron. It’s a different part of the forest. Change the lights if you want. Move a log. Go nuts.

This is, of course, the least professional stage direction ever written.

See, when I originally wrote Three Oranges, I was directing it and I knew, personally, every single person who would read the script. This was my attempt to make the tech crew, who were often unsure of what to make us creative types, chuckle and win them over a bit. At the time, the thought that anyone outside of that circle of people would ever read the play never crossed my mind.

When I first starting licensing the show for productions, I completely forgot that line was in there until I started to see people referencing it on social networks. Turns out, nearly everyone who mentioned it thought it was hilarious so I decided to leave it in. It’s not like the play’s real concerned with keeping the 4th wall intact anyway.

That line remains in the play to this day and I still sometimes feel a little weird about it. Which is why I was endlessly pleased when I learned that the following is an actual line from the official script for The Avengers movie:

And Hulk smashes Thor and his big Norse face.

If Joss Whedon is allowed to have a little fun with his stage directions on one of the biggest movies of all time, I feel much better about my little indulgence.